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total posts: 6
Blog title: getting out of harm's own...or
Blog description:

true presence of self=joy in love

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re: part 2 (to) : will it really matter.. Posted on Tue, Jan 29, 2013 00:00

i tried to befriend a doctor-new to the bay area in general, org. from saudi arabia-and is a heart and lung specialist. this seemed appealing at 1st, by status/millionaire?+-but lo and beholden is: what they find a better? availability to motivate collaberate/co-operation over and acquisitioning successful measure-is his and a female meeting, based on of her being more physically attractive-and not caring about emotional availability. i sense this most from the proofs of his facebook page showing no variance of lifestyle, just the factor of (beautiful) women, had or contemplating having:(. even though i understand what a dr's schedule entails that they are truly busy-and can't distract too much-there's nothing more shady, unflattering and unattractive about about a person-who is absenting of not being emotionally relational/available to have connectively far exceeding sexual gratification NO MATTER IF MILLIONAIRE-which is all that i can see his fb page point to of him, so in end-i know from here for me, that i am/wasn't ever going to be in competition with other women-esp. originating from his homeland-most prefered, but would have instead been in competition with HIM-of his not being fully present-even if only all the time-being the remain of friends. i now look forward to having better befriend gather and solidify with other people-including men from any middle eastern, britain, canada-or u.s. origin. meanwhile i'll have fun kissing the tv when cenk uyker is on current tv (station (LOL:)!!)

intentionally and amendably looking forward,


will it really matter what a potential prtner will do 4 work Posted on Sat, Jan 12, 2013 00:00

Of the following-I’ve not only wondered of in the moment, but as well what future there

may be-in even pursuing to finding it worthwhile, to fixate on people who’s work wont’ befit

the have of us, serious relationship-between they and I. I truly don’t want to waste our time bcs, extrinsically

I can bring more into the ‘ship-even in just growing to remain friends, which is sincerely possible, for I feel already-that he’s not sensing me irresistible. so of the situation-I’m vacillating, and feeling frustrated.


I’ve recently grown fixated with a gentleman who is a doctor. it’s early in the interact, with us volleying messages back n forth thus far. he’s doctor at a not only a hospital, but a teaching hospital at that. so the rotations and probably estimating student loads to teach-leave him next to no room to not only not truly date, but probably not to have much time to stretch out and play a possible pick-up game, of say basketball with colleagues, and just down right-be a boy, in between situations, missing out on these pausings-due to amongst so much adultify of work necessating him to be uber competent.


I happen to sleuth of him on Facebook-and found that there’s no variance of lifestyle, the dominance of friends that are on his f.b. page are women, of the same nationality as he (for he’s Arab) and he didn’t before know until very recently-that I’m not fellow countryman. (btw: I’m African American). I can relate to him-for the scientific/intellect of what we each

know about medicine, so his income is farthest from my qualifying him attractive to me, even if he is nominally-a millionaire.


now, I know one answer to his potentially being relationshipped is that he could be traditional, and estimatingly export a woman from his country of origin, to take her up as bride, but doesn’t bcs he may not be traditional, and remains single-bcs the work that he does fronts as though he can remain 1) single only-and/or 2) won’t take up ‘ship into serious enough to marry bcs work won’t befit.

..and then there’s that I’m not irresistible to him-by I sense, sight-which of course between the truly mature , isn’t all that


So if I stay now, i would be taking a risk to: 1) be a friend-n remaining so, and don’t just want to remain so of anyone  for the best of our matching synergy of our Spirits amiably, so if there literally isn’t Divine co-create purposeful to move us proceed into more intrinsic connectivity-maybe to marry, I am better to just move on.


clarity in truth is the most important, overriding my fixation that could mount into feelings.

anyone care to relate? if not comment?


thanks for “letting” me shareJ