I'd like to give any newcomers to the blogs the chance to know who we all are. This being a long running 'soap' saga, please have that familiar theme tune playing in your head whilst reading. . here goes.. .. ..
.. Cassie is our resident genius with an IQ of 278, sadly she is also color blind and can never tell which pill is which, so tends to get into trouble at times. She thinks Barb is her Mom when in reality Barb is mother of Nola who was boinking Will and may even be Will, with or without her will, sadly though, Nola was taken by the aliens, who were brought here by VL, now he is an interesting one, but has delusions - meanwhile Queenie- who loves horses especially horned ones, is busy managing all her millionaires, getting them filed in the right order hopefully ready to share with trish and jody who are long lost sisters and dont know it. There could be another problem as mrkisses is the grandfather to both cb and shaz and while making eyes at them from afar,not knowing he is about to commit grandfather insest,but thats another story entirely. Honey is on a mission to find perfection while misskitty found it and lost it several times and doesn't realise it's still on the top of her head. Angelchops hoards TP. Leon went to 'roo and returned deaf so can't hear when the little people are yelling in his direction, along with glasgow, who is the resident sex God, which he would be great at if only the women could understand his accent. Genie has a small one that makes her blush on cobblestones, while mrfx's is so massive he faints daily. BJ's aunt is stat's third cousins grandmother twice removed, which makes for fun holidays and keeps hallmark in business. Pauline escaped from the same place Cassie was in a few weeks ago, although she was the resident shrink and not an inmate. (So she says anyway) RG is the artist formerly known as Hootz, and is really a 789 lb. wrestler from Idaho.
More next week....
I have been slowly extracting myself over the past few weeks and have to say, the times I have looked in to read, have been mostly a disappointment - and dismay at the pathetic crappola that has been going on. How the hell MM expects to keep the SANE people coming here is beyond me. Sadly it seems the blogs are a lunatic magnet, bringing out all the properties of a rather ancient mental patient. ( it rhymed .. what can I say.. ha) How someone can create a war from a simple question is baffling to me, as is how anyone can create so many trolls, constantly lie and abuse the good nature of the kinder members ~ it's nothing but totally abhorrent. Their time will come, Karma is a Biatch.
This is supposed to be a dating site, where we can maybe also make friends, NOT somewhere to test out your latest Bi-Polar Medication. This used to be a fun place to wind down, now it's a battle ground ~ good people are leaving or have already left because of the bollocks. Sadly many seem to thrive on any kind of attention, or getting 'one over' on the members by pretending to be someone or something they are not. Shame on the guilty ones I say... and,it's also pretty bloody obvious who you are most of the time.
"Crying Wolf" or lying to get attention will eventually backfire, as when you really ARE in need of someone, they won't be there, having heard the sh!t too many times before.
Sadly, many wonderful members have a hard time shining through the BS in this place, little wonder really, when one idiotic blog after another pushes other posts down the list.
I think there should be added tests to allow people to join this place, not only proof of identity with zip code, but also proof that a person isn't a leading cast member of 'one flew over the cuckoo's nest'.
I had a really interesting and long conversation with someone yesterday about something quite relevant to some of us here. It of course nudged my memory and opened my eyes to my own current situation.
Do we really want to become the perception others may have of us? Hmm.. how to better explain it.. (it's early yet..ha) If we talk about illness all the time, do we really want to be perceived by others as 'that sick person' ? If we love the drama, do we want to be known as the 'drama queen' ? It's so easy to fall into the 'role illusion' that others may have of us, as at times - especially with very little other outside influence - we get wrapped up in something negative, and it completely takes us over. Hardly surprising when each day consists of hardship, illness or whatever other negativity is going on. The trick is to nurture the positive aspects and roll with them, instead of becoming the projected negative self. It's actually pretty much being in the dark and lifting ourselves to the light, back to the old 'awareness' thing again.
I'm sure most of us don't want to be seen in a negative light, however it takes some thinking about and effort ~ hearing the words we use, and topics we choose to speak with others ~ from their angle, not our own.
It might just change your life.
I wrote this yesterday, but it seems to have had technical difficulties..hmm.....
After the weekend I had - and kimi's recent blogs, my head is once again full ... I sometimes really wish I didn't think so much, but one thing is for certain, I am very happy - no matter what - that I live with an open heart at all times, & that I have love and kindness to give, and that's love for my fellow human, not the special love that I also have which is actually saved for just one person. (HA!)
The person I met on Saturday set the ball rolling, the ongoing saga of my best friends romantic breakup - kept it going. It really upsets me that there seems to be so little thought and humanity these days. It took 9/11 to bring some kind of feeling together as a country or community- do we really have to wait until something like that happens again to bring us, as humans, out of our caves, to have love, not greed, selfishness or anger, towards others? Every day we have is precious, really every hour is. I truly do not understand why any of us waste it on ridiculous games, dishonesty, meaness, greed or complete disregard to anyone else around. It costs nothing to be friendly or kind, a smile, to help, to give - and not constantly receive. I'm tired of it all, to be honest I really don't understand what joy anybody could ever get from life, the way many seem to live it.
Today, the most important man I ever had in my life would have been 73.He's been gone 9 years. In 2 days it's the anniversary of mums passing 8 years ago. This isn't about them..or pity..it's a point - People die, it's a part of life, it could happen to any of us at any minute, yet the chance of true happiness is eluded by most, because they "can't see the wood for the tree's".
Maybe I'm a dreamy idiot, but I am true to myself and others, I'm very far from selfish. Maybe I'm the one living in an illusion. I would rather that, that the alternative.
Did you know.. between the old and new testaments, there are 774,746 words in the Bible?
I wonder just how many actually make sense when you read them, without having to put your own perspective on them. Shame so many get lost in the importance of their own notions ~ adapting the words to say what they want them to say, then shove it down other's throats. :-)
The following, is what life is really all about.
1 Corinthians 13
1~ If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 ~ If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3~ If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.
4~ Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5~ It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6~ Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7~ It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8~ Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9~ For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10~ but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11~ When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.
12~ Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. 13~ And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
Before I go, I would like to give grace to the many here who have had a year of suffering, and considering we are but a tiny slice of society, the percentage of us who have had a heavy ~ and some devastating ~ time this year, are pretty high ~ maybe that's why we're here, and I'm having a huge blonde moment, whatever, I would still like to give grace.
~Your fortitude has been incredible and your bravery immense. I know that time does heal everything, yet scars are left, I hope your scars are not too deep and painful. Please know, your pain didn't pass by unnoticed and hasn't been in vain, strength has been gained by the events, for you and hopefully for many others ~ including myself. Thank you, from my heart to yours, for sharing your most personal and sometimes quite horrific, stories with us here. You know who you are.
I hope and pray that the coming new year will hold much more joy and abundance for you.
.. and of course, I wish the same for each and every one of you... :-)
Here we are at that jolly time of year again and I'm swept away in a sea of desperately wanting to keep old traditions going, yet knowing that some are tied in 'days now gone', and being completely bloody immobile next to my usual standards, along with now living somewhere that never gets truly cold (hard to find the festive spirit when sweating one's 'cobs' off).. ... and the mess of over political correctness that is sweeping the Country. I'm very confused. ( that's not unusual though ha!)
The Christmas stuff will right itself, and new traditions are being made annually, I'll be brave and slowly lift a few ornaments onto a tree at some point, even though they may weigh over 2 ounces. (haha)
However, the P.C crap has to stop before we (or 'they'.. whoever 'they' are) ~ screw everything up for us and future generations. What difference does it make if I say Merry Christmas to a Jewish person? It is a festive greeting given with joy from my heart. Not an insult or slight against anyone or anything. I want a Christmas tree, not a Holiday tree, with a Christmas dinner and Christmas presents. Life as we know it is slowly being torn from us, and a stand needs to be made.
If it is insulting to the African American race to be called 'black', then let them find a name they are all happy with, let the rest of us know, and from then on use that. FOREVER. If you are Jewish in a community of mixed religions, please note, Hanukkah is now on the map and out there for us all to see, it does NOT mean the rest of us have to forego our traditions, none of us should. I'm so bored with political correctness ~ it's out of control and slowly taking our spirits.
Time to think and reflect lately, read blogs, talk with friends... & I think have some answers to questions that tend to come up over and over for many of us.
1. This whole crap about men looking for younger women, exists because those particular men are scared sh!tless of getting old and want their youth to be reflected back at them. Sad really, and one hell of a wake up call at some point.
2. Women with a 'bright light', or something positively different to the 'norm', are not overlooked because they are intimidating, but because they are perceived to be too much 'work'. If it means a guy may have to actually use his brain to attract your attention - when he can just be an ignorant dork and still get laid - why would he use the effort? The bigger question is for the 'special' woman, why on earth WOULD she want the attention of such a man??
3. With the knowledge of what goes on within the confines of a dating site, would any of us actually WANT a man who has been on one for any length of time? It's been my experience - (back when I used to be contacted here haha)- that we are all bracketed (see 1&2) - and therefore dismissed within a few moments of a conversation if we are not willing to 'play the game'. (see #2)
4. It seems we, as women on dating sites, have become a type of MacDonalds' smorgasbord - if it's quick, easy and cheap - or free- the attention will be given, if there's effort involved and something different, then forget it. (see #2) As with family life, cooking in this day and age, making an effort seems to have gone by the wayside.
The question is, and it's for both sexes, do we REALLY want attention from such folks? Why do people lower standards to get attention? It's complete desperation and a total cop out of who you really are. And really, in the end it's lying, to yourself and ultimately the other person too.
Dating sites are not as fun as one would think, what they can be, is a quick burst of attention -when letting standards drop. Which may fill a need at the time, but like eating a whole chocolate cake, will leave a crappy feeling at some point.
I reckon, we should raise our standards and see things differently. Give grace to ourselves, remember who we are and never drop one single standard we have just to let a man into our lives. Why should we? Isn't it they who should be jumping through hoops to get us?
Desperation is an ugly trait, and can come about easily in dating sites - from both sexes.
I suggest, we set aside at least one day a week to go out with friends, make the effort - dress up, slap on the happy face and get out into the real world, where we can be seen in our entirety. We may not get the attention some are seeking straight away, but there's a damn sight better chance it will come ~ the more we get out there. And at least we can immediately see that the intention is honorable and true... and that something other than the 'little head' used to think with. ;-)
I know there are some good people around online, sadly we are all the exception to the rule. However, I give you grace and take my virtual hat off to you all. :-)
And don't go thinking I've become jaded ( that happened months ago ~ haha ) - just saddened by the lack of control, discipline and standards from many.
What d'ya think people ??
I have spent most of my adult life being very cautious of women folk, stepping back for a long while before engaging into any kind of relationship including the female gender.. This has begun to change over the past few years. Several things were pointed out to me by a good (male) friend yesterday, which has prompted this blog.
The friends I have had through the years, some of which are still with me ~ ( moving a lot tends to make it harder to stay in touch, especially when it's a continent away) ~ have been incredible, loving, kind (and of both sexes). There could have been more, but I kept many at arms length because of the 'fear factor'. Now, unless plainly obvious that someone is a manipulator or evil doer (!) I welcome everyone and give the friendship a whirl. Through doing this, I have allowed many wonderful and amazing ladies into my world, and thus become more than enriched with funny, smart and amazing people, who I hope will be friends forever ~ or at least until that particular timeline of friendship has run it's course (as they sometimes seem to within our lifetime ~ yet some are with us til' the end). I wanted to give grace to these ladies, many of which are here on MM.
* Thank you for sharing your love and light with me, and for being the truly amazing women you are. For making me laugh, crack up even, and helping me to regain my faith in womanhood, for being there in my times of need, and allowing me to be there in yours. You have all enriched my life more than you can imagine, and paved the way for others to follow in your footsteps. *
A very wise and evolved lady reminded me yesterday :
"We attract what we energetically give out" (sic)
Very true sweetcheeks, and thank you for the reminder. :-)
After some displays this weekend (not including me, but the girlfriend ' in love' I once blogged about before...) My head has gone to the question or Romance. Hmm! Does this beast exist? and if so, what guise does it come in? I was once told by somebody here that my version of romance and needs are no different to any other woman's, and I have to say I disagree.. to a point. Maybe the question is what we don't need is a better question.... I dunno, but my attention has been drawn to the whole wooing thing. And after all, I am the Romantic Goddess.. so I should know a thing or two eh? :-)
My sister/friend Nik.. came down from NC (this weekend) with Jimmy.. who so far is a friend, I met him while there in August. The sexual tension between them was sickeningly yuk. (LOL!) While working on him at my office, he asked me about the whole romance thing - (he thinks I'm a wise old woman) (haha) - and I had to point out that the things he was doing with and for Nik was actually classic old fashioned wooing.. his answer? A Southern drawl - :" Really now" . sheesh and duh !!! I have never seen a more attentive, caring sweetheart, yet strong (although short.. he is 7 feet tall in many ways) and very testosterone filled... a real man.
To me, Romance starts with the laughter, and the fun, secret language that springs up while the games and laughs are going on.. and if the chemistry is right, it flows from there, and onlookers think you have both lost your minds completely. He makes her feel like the only woman in the room, even while talking to others... isn't that what it's all about ? It most certainly isn't about anything material, or greed, or power. It's passion and fun all rolled into one, with eyes only for you.
I have to say, I want my very own "Jimmy".
Well, I just signed up for another 3 months and am wondering why. However, stay I will, as I have realized that this place runs in cycles. Having read most of the blogs on the front page over the last week and shaking my head at the games being played, I'm kind of saddened, although I imagine it to be typical.. it certainly has been since I arrived here.
I don't like the way people get pushed out when some deem it time, fun or necessary. The bumping blogs crap is so childish it makes me want to run... or barf. I totally understand why some old timers stay in lurking mode and say very little. they have seen the BS time and time again, sometimes even with the same person or people. Which is of course what newer members forget - and so the circle continues.
The 'kiss-ass' illusion is just that, and people fall for it every time.
I stay, because there are truly great and wonderful people here. And on that note..
Kristen, I wish you would stay, your love and insight is what we need here, personally I don't think you, or others, blog, or say enough - and I think you have a LOT to offer. . . The same with you Elaine, I hope you stay, I love your sincerity and honesty, and that you wear your heart on your sleeve.
There are many fun, clever and interesting people here, and we wouldn't be here if we hadn't had shit times in our past or be going through them now. Are we paying our monthly fee to insult others and be insulted ?
This place sends you to paranoia.. in many ways. BUT the good does eventually outweigh the bad. We don't all have to like each other, and sometimes it takes time to get to know people.
This is just condensed life is all... winners, losers, idiots and charmers, liars and sweethearts.
I really hope the blogfog lifts soon. I miss the people and the fun.
Have faith... and chocolate fudge cake :-)