Blog title: Where have all the good 'ole boys gone?
Blog description:Are there no REAL MEN out there anymore, you know the type that fix cars, watch sports, go hunting, appreciate a home cooked meal. One that loves dogs and horses, sitting on the back porch listening to the crickets, getting lost in the country, making out in the truck while the rain is pounding the hood. Can start an old tractor with a screwdriver. No fancy trips, expensive cars (unless its the new F450). Just the regular baseball caps and jeans (or better yet, cowboy hat) kind of guys.
My blog address: http://MillionaireMatch.com/blog/countrygirl0401
HEY YA'LL...COME PULL YOU UP A CHAIR...WHAT'LL BE YOUR PLEASURE TONIGHT? THE BAND IS PLAYIN' ALL NIGHT..SO MAKE YOUR REQUESTS TO THAT PRETTY LADY AT THE BAR...
"we've got winners, we've got losers, chain smokers and boozers, we've got hustlers, we've got fighters, thristy hickhikers..I love this bar"
I'll take two of those...!!!
sorry I couln't resist...
So it seems are little social experiment of "pretend marriages" has taken a turn for the worse. Let me just be perfectly blunt..if you haven't figured it out yet or are too scared to admit it..race, religion, class, education, background, age, and appearances DO MATTER. You as a human being judge and are judged everyday..We scroll through hundreds of pictures and profiles on this site, not even knowing that we in seconds judge whether we would like that person or not. Call it "chemisty" call it what you like..Opposites do attract, but seldom have the power to stay for the long haul. The smart ones embrace different cultures and ideas and learn from those that cross their path. So may I say that my brilliant, but often misunderstood friend doc was right. We DO prefer to date "our own species" or let me say it the country way.."birds of a feather..flock together"
Being a racist is being closed minded, picking a mate that matches your background and beliefs is not. It is the most important choice of your life. Believe it or not we all judge, it's just human nature.
10. IF YOUR HORSE STARTS TO STRAY, YOU CAN JUST THROW A ROPE AROUND HIS NECK.
9. YOU CAN SEE TO IT THAT YOUR HORSE IS WELL GROOMED.
8. ONCE YOU BREAK A HORSE, HE'LL ALWAYS BE OBEDIENT.
7. A HORSE CAN UNDERSTAND WHY YOU'D WANT TO BUY YOUR SHOES IN SETS OF FOUR.
6. HORSES ARE INTO "STABLE" RELATIONSHIPS.
5. YOU CAN HAVE HORSES GELDED AND THEY HARDLY SEEM TO NOTICE.
4. A HORSE WOULD RATHER MUNCH HIS WILD OATS THAN SOW THEM.
3. YOU CAN LEAD A HORSE TO WATER, BUT A MAN WILL INSIST ON DRIVING AND GET YOU HOPELESSLY LOST.
2. ANY MAN WOULD HAVE TO ADMIT THAT, NEXT TO A HORSE, HE FEELS SOMEHOW..INADEQUATE.
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON
THERE ARE PLENTY OF GOOD HORSES TO GO AROUND.
A man took his wife to the rodeo and one of their first stops was
the breeding bull exhibit. They went up to the first pen and there was
a sign attached that said, "This bull mated 52 times last year."
The wife playfully nudged her husband in the ribs and said, "See ..
He mated 52 times last year? .once-a-week."
They walked to the second pen which had a sign attached that said,
"This bull mated 125 times last year."
The wife gave her husband a healthy jab and said, "That's more than
twice a week! You could learn a lot from him."
They walked to the third pen and it had a sign attached that said, in
capital letters, "This bull mated 365 times last year."
The wife, so excited that her elbow nearly broke her husband's ribs,
said, that's once-a-DAY. You could REALLY learn something from this
The husband looked at her and said, "Go over and ask him if it was
with the same cow."
NOTE: The husband's condition has been upgraded from critical to
stable and the doctors say after months of rehab and a couple more
operations he will be ok.
Be the perfect girlfriend?
By Jon Wilde Reese and Ryan fizzled out, Britney and K-Fed fell apart, and when the dust cleared, all that remained of each blessed union was a crisp pre-nup to divvy up the belongings. Which got me thinking, Why rely on a legal document to fix the end of a relationship when I can use one to create the ideal relationship? So here it is; my contract for the perfect girlfriend. Laugh at it if you will, ladies, but you are about to get some startling insights onto the male mind.
I, [print your name here] (heretofore referred to as ?The Lady?), being of sound mind, have entered into a relationship with [print guy?s name here] (heretofore referred to as ?The Man?). By signing below, I hereby agree to abide by all the rules as set out within this contract in perpetuity.
Clause 1: Dates
A. The Lady will eat more than a side salad.
B. The Man will not be expected to plan every date. He will be chivalrous, but he will not be the cruise director of the relationship.
C. If The Lady would like to attend an event that she knows The Man will despise, she is advised to do so with other people (See Clause 5: Extra-Curricular Activities). However, should she deem a night at the ballet, opera, or foreign movie house to be a necessity within the scope of the relationship, she should make plans (transportation, tickets, etc.) for this evening herself.
1.By accepting this Lady-partisan date, The Man will be guaranteed one (1) date on which both parties participate in an activity of his choice?including, but not limited to: Attending an athletic event, watching a martial-arts movie, or going out for a large BBQ dinner.
Clause 2: Dialogue
A. The Lady will never discuss an ex-boyfriend.
1.Rule 2-a above may be broken if The Lady mentions a deep and abiding flaw in the ex-boyfriend, while also discussing ways in which The Man betters said ex.
B. If The Lady wants something or wants to know something, she will ask. There will be no hints or guessing games.
C. Any cute nicknames that The Lady has devised for The Man will never be spoken in public. See Clause 6, Section a, Subsection 3 for explanation.
1.Furthermore, The Lady may not devise any nickname that includes a diminutive or that is spoken in baby-voice (e.g., ?Little John? or ?Snuggle Bear?).
Clause 3: The Bedroom
A. During moments of physicality, The Lady will voice her wishes so that The Man knows how best to make her enjoy the experience. This is expected not only for her sake, but for his. The Man is a prideful being. He wants to know he can do everything right.
B. The Man reserves the right to his favorite side of the bed at all times, no exceptions. He may permit The Lady to rest on his chosen side if he wishes, but should he find himself tossing and turning at 3 a.m., it his right to reclaim said side with no ill will from The Lady.
Clause 4: Family
A. The Lady will not ask The Man to meet her family until at least one month of dating has been completed.
B. Upon meeting The Man?s mother, The Lady will try to learn as many of Mother Man?s recipes as possible. And yes, The Man likes his chicken that dry.
Clause 5: Extracurricular Activities
A. The Man will be guaranteed at least one Guys? Night per week, chosen at his discretion. He will also retain at least two extra ?floating? Guys? Nights per month in case of an important sporting event or should an impromptu post-work visit to the bar arise.
B. The Lady can never be angry with a man for attending Guy?s Night.
C. The Lady will not call The Man more than once per Guys? Night.
D. The Lady is encouraged to go out with her own friends as a means for keeping her independence and sense of self. However, there are ground rules for these engagements:
1.She will not ask The Man to attend any event on the day of a televised athletic match, any event that involves the phrase ?pot luck,? or any event that celebrates the birth of a child, impending or otherwise.
2.She will not expect The Man to attend a gathering solely because the boyfriend/husband of The Lady?s Friend will also be in attendance. Misery does not make good company.
3.No. Ex-Boyfriends. Ever.
Clause 5: Love
A. Should the two parties remain together long enough to reach Relationship Level: Serious, The Man understands that he will, at some point, be called upon to vocally express his appreciation of The Lady in the strongest method possible. When the time comes, the following rules shall govern the use of Those Three Words Which Shall Not Yet Be Spoken.
1.The Lady will be the first party to speak the phrase. She will do so clearly and while making eye contact so that The Man knows it is he who is being spoken to. The Lady will allow the man at least five (5) minutes to respond in kind. This reprieve does not mean he doesn?t feel the same way, only that he is apt to be flustered, frightened, and suddenly stricken with cotton-mouth.
2.After the first time the Man arranges the words ?I,? ?you,? and ?love? into a sentence, he will not be required to do so in response every time The Lady speaks the phrase. The Lady will also accept ?Me, too,? ?Ditto,? or a high-five in return.
3.The Lady will never speak the three-worded phrase when The Man is in the presence of either friends or coworkers. This is done out of respect for the mockery that is sure to result should he be forced to reciprocate while with said company.
By signing below, you agree to all rules as laid out in this contract, effectively guaranteeing that you will make The Man a truly happy person for the rest of his life, or until you realize that he is a loser who requires his girlfriends to sign legally binding documents.
Print your name
If her truck is bigger than yours...You might be dating a redneck.
If she is excited to help field dress a deer.....
If the local pound calls her house first....
If she can carry a 50lbs bag of feed....
If she knows the first day of hunting season.......
If the Christmas lights are still on the porch........
If your friends don't want her to go out because of the last bar fight she got you into...
ADD to it..Y'all
Are there no REAL MEN out there anymore, you know the type that fix cars, watch sports, go hunting, appreciate a home cooked meal. One that loves dogs and horses, sitting on the back porch listening to the crickets, getting lost in the country, making out in the truck while the rain is pounding the hood. Can start an old tractor with a screwdriver. No fancy trips, expensive cars (unless its the new F450). Just the regular baseball caps and jeans (or better yet, cowboy hat) kind of guys.