Member's Blog > Beachmonk's blogs > Why Men Cheat !!!
Why Men Cheat !!! Sort by:
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Posted on Tue, Apr 03, 2007 06:23 PM

I have begun writing a book on why men cheat and the motivations behind their indescetions. For you men out there, feel free to post your comments or email me directly For you woman, tune in, because this blog is going to be very interesting. The first reason I would like to put out there for discussion is that Men have to cheat, to maintain their fragile sense of self esteem.


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Posted on Mon, Jul 10, 2017 12:20 AM

Quoting rmac22:

Since the beginning of time cheaters have left more offspring behind.  Those they raised and those raised by other men.  



 

I love your Comment RMAC .. Its true ..



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Posted on Sun, Jul 09, 2017 10:48 PM

Since the beginning of time cheaters have left more offspring behind.  Those they raised and those raised by other men.  



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Posted on Sun, Jul 09, 2017 08:52 PM

I've just now stumbled across your blog.  Did you finish your book, and how did it go? 

 

Now that I'm here, I'll add a few thoughts. 

 

The majority of the times that I've been cheated on, were by guys who weren't completely over their exes.  Of course, things never ended up working out with their ex's, and in the meantime, they've ruined things with me. 

 

One guy, it was an ex-girlfriend that broke up his marriage twice.  And they'd ended things 18 months before, but he couldn't get her out of his system, even admitting to me that he knew I was the way better one for him! 

 

Another big one for me, has been long distance relationships, and the guys don't know how to keep their pants on and stay committed.  When temptation is in front of them, they are weak and crumble. 

 

Some just unfortunately weren't raised with good old fashioned morals that myself, and others were raised with. 

 

I also tend to believe that old saying "once a cheater, always a cheater," is for the most part, generally true.  

Hence, why I never cheat in the first place.  I do believe that once a person cheats, it becomes an easy pattern, that they can now rationalize.  They figured they've already done it once. Sort of like once a person loses their virginity. 

 

Unfortunately, the cheaters, make it hard for those like myself, who have had enough of it, and refuse to waste their time on men like that, and chose not to date, until enough trust is built. 

 

A big reason for many men, is low self esteem, the feeling of wanting to be wanted, the power, the thrill, and the instant gratification, and satisfying their own selfish needs, without caring about others feelings. 

 

And the obvious, hormones, hormones, hormones...with no practice of self-control.  Teenage boys trapped in grown up bodies. 

 

 



Isitfate4unme

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Posted on Sun, Jul 09, 2017 02:01 AM

 

I had been to many occasions , other countries and had met 

many people ..the only reason I have heard , and witnessed why 

men ( mostly ) Cheat is " they just can't say No frankly" ( either 

out of politeness towards women or the fear of being branded 

as no *ggs )..under unplanned circumstances ..Women are more courageous to say NO ( mostly )..

 

Sorry Guys ..just saying



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Posted on Sat, Jul 08, 2017 02:56 PM

Quoting Lostinmyeyes:

sounds like you cheat!


Who are you responding to?  The author who is long gone?  



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Posted on Fri, Jul 07, 2017 08:38 PM

I love the author's perspective! Otherwise, simply put, men cheat because they can. I can also see it as a "means of survival." I totally get their point. Men are always given passes for being "human" and having reasons to enjoy variety, as if women are any different. We enjoy variety too. We just are not permitted the same luxury. This is what we know: Almost all men cheat, so women, do what you have to do to protect yourself. Be proactive. If you decide to be with a man long-term, make sure he has means to provide you with a handsome offering, should he cheat. It stings less that way. Nobody has time to put this any other way. Learn to be #Savage. #GuardYourHeart



Her Royal Majesty~

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Posted on Wed, Jul 05, 2017 05:18 AM

This is why I'm watching and waiting for a man with strong inner strength.. Secure with who he is.. Then we will be a vibrational match together.. happy and grounded.. enjoying life and all it has to offer..;-)


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Posted on Tue, Jul 04, 2017 03:31 PM

one word, one basic instinct: survival. it is a fundamental rule governing the living universe. if men wouldn't be cheaters us humans would not exist. I am afraid it is that simple.



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Posted on Tue, Jul 04, 2017 01:15 PM

men get the slightest Attention from any Female and they think they are gods gift to women


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Posted on Tue, Jul 04, 2017 05:07 AM

sounds like you cheat!


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Posted on Thu, Sep 24, 2015 05:01 PM

Good evening all!

 

Sorry I came to this discussion late but had to respond.  

 

First of all, let's understand that a cheater can be male or female.  However, since the topic is about men, I will draw upon a famous line from a scene in "Moonstruck".

 

When John Mahoney's character tries to persuade a stern Olympia Dukukis to allow him into her abode,  she sternly remarks "You're a little boy and you wanna be bad!".  The response...just like the mastercard ad....PRICELESS!!

 

Adults make decisions understanding the consquences of their actions.  Children throw caution to the wind... (even if it's down wind to a stockyard) 

 

Remain blessed.



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Posted on Sat, Sep 19, 2015 01:53 PM

it really isn't and I'm guessing based on that response most men have cheated on you. Makes sense



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Posted on Mon, Sep 01, 2014 01:55 AM

Men cheat for the same reasons women cheat.  There's no difference between the sexes.  I'd say the largest reason for cheating is that the mastery of sex is largely a mystery and both sexes are unsatisfied in the bedroom.  The most ridiculous situation is to back yourself into an emotional relationship when the sex is flat and untinteresting.   Most men I've found haven't a clue how to connect in sex and most women I'm afraid aren't telling their men what they want.  Each bump in the dark and niehter are being honnest about their motives.

 

Cheating that hurts the most in my oppinion is the cheating that's done for the thrill of being decietful.  These individuals are actually aroused at the risk of humiliating their partner.   

 

Some individuals are gifted in act of sex and need a constant menue of new partners.  These individuals just should not be in a closed relationship and find other's who share that same open thinking.  It's unfortunate that sexual integrity isn't discussed, I in fact, have entire chapter about it.   I support those who have the guts to openly broker their sexuality, pair appropriately and request for open relationships when you know your not capable of maintaining a closed one.

 

Honestly men, most women should be having affairs if you wrap it up under 6 minutes and roll over and go to sleep...lol...I'm just saying. 



Unapologetically Feminine

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Posted on Sun, Aug 31, 2014 04:59 PM

If a man is feeling valued, appreciated,  supported, encouraged, and acknowledged he is truly a lucky man who found a woman who is unique and very loving. He would then be a fool to risk all that is so special in a relationship.

 

Men may cheat not because they are missing one of the above but just because they want something different and new. It may not have anything to do with love at all. Just temporary chemistry, challenge and a different physical pleasure. Even though its very selfcentered he may not think about that at the moment but may feel very guilty later. The dangerous thing he may be tempted repeatedly. Especially if his marriage is not doing well.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



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Posted on Sat, Aug 21, 2010 10:30 PM

Hi there,we only ask what your thinking to confirm what we KNOW is going on,women's intuition is a very annoying DON for men,Sorry men are very simple beings because they are so predictable.Very few of them have any respect for any thing that is not themselves.They can't be true even to their own shadows.


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Posted on Thu, Jul 22, 2010 12:23 AM

When I was 18 my father took me to Thailand....a bit awkward as I boarded a bus full of men in their 30

s and 40's from around the world who where on their way to Patya Beach for sex. My father was 38 and their for the same reasons...everyone thought we were lovers..but he was my father who walked with me and talked to me as we passed man after man after man...and he told me why these men were there and he made me sit with his lovers in the morning...and he told me how important it was to learn how to master the art of pleasure....

As harsh as this story may sound, it is mine and never have I had a man cheat on me becuase I learned early that as a woman we are the Seductress and it is an honorable noble position.

Wathc a Lioness who hunts for her male.

Shiva holds the space while Shakti dances.

Loose your egos and rise in Mastery as a Goddess and this topci will no longer exist!!



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Posted on Thu, Jul 01, 2010 11:48 PM

Hello everyone.... I am back on the site after a 1 1/2 year hiatus. I am amazed that you all have kept this blog alive and running since I left. I see we've had over 7,000 views. Wow.

 

Why Men Cheat is a topic which has drawn much controversy and chatter... the topic seems to really hit a nerve. Perhaps because it causes so much pain.

 

It hurts to be cheated on. To be betrayed. But there is another side to the topic.... the WHY.

 

Let's continue to explore the topic in detail and discover the answers together.

 

Marc Holland

 

 



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Posted on Tue, Mar 16, 2010 04:09 PM

Quoting wwww12345

Maslow does indeed have part of the answer, but not all. If you look at nature, you will find that almost all species cheat, males and females. Cheating provided genetic diversity, which is good for the species. Thus, to not cheat is actually going against what is natural and built in as a survival of the species instinct.


Hello W.

i agree with you..men and women cheat..it is human nature...some times they need to feel full filled and need attention or simply they need fun time...so they cheat...men mostly cheat because of insecurity and lack of self esteem...


Julie



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Posted on Sat, Feb 20, 2010 05:53 AM

'EGO' is a problem of both men and women. Unconditional love is rare...man has evolved from other beings of the past and instincts cannot be suppressed. Some men that cheat are good men others evil men...but who is to blame?


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