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3345roc
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Posted on Thu, Nov 14, 2013 08:47

Received this the other day..
Author Unknown.

Cow Economics: 

After the recent teetering on the edge of total economic and financial meltdown, it seems economic systems and their workings have pushed their way into the need to know category. Well, we can now simplify this all by explaining twenty-one (21) basic economic models:


SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows.
You have to give one to your neighbour.


COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk.


FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and sells you some milk.


NAZISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and shoots you.


BUREAUCRATIC
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.


TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.


SURREALISM
You have two giraffes.
The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.


AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has dropped dead.


AN INVESTMENT BANK
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. 
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company. 
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. 
You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States, leaving you with nine cows. 
No balance sheet is provided with the release. 
The public then buys your bull.


A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike, organize a riot and block the roads, because you want three cows.


A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever cow cartoon image called 'Cowkimon' and market it worldwide.


A GERMAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.


A RUSSIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. You count them and learn you have five cows.
You count them again and learn you have forty-two cows.
You count them again and learn you have two cows.
You stop counting cows and open another bottle of vodka.


A SWISS CORPORATION
You have five thousand cows. None of them belong to you.
You charge the owners for storing them.


A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows. You have three-hundred people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reports the real situation.


AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows. You worship them.


A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows. Both are mad.


A WEST VIRGINIA CORPORATION
You have two cows.
The one on the left looks very attractive.


AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are. You decide to have lunch.


AN IRISH CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't care where they are. You decide to have a pint.

 

 




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3345roc
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Posted on Mon, Jan 13, 2014 12:37

Quoting Jenkneee:

Excellent post 3345Roc, I am gonna be sharing it for sure.Thanks for posting!



Be my guest my dear...



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Jenkneee
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Posted on Tue, Nov 26, 2013 16:20

Excellent post 3345Roc, I am gonna be sharing it for sure.Thanks for posting!



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Dakota35
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Posted on Tue, Nov 26, 2013 12:25

Quoting 3345roc:

Obama follows the principles of modified Robin Hood economics... steal from the rich and keep for myself!  As far as job creation, he never had a real job and I don't belive anyone in his admin has had one either.  Smiling Joe Biden went from high school to Congress without ever working.  He was in the bottom third of his college class, got 5 student deferments to avoid Vietnam, was in the bottom 10% of his law school class and has been in politics for the past 40 years.  He smiles so much I swear he doesn't have a central nervous system.  How he ever landed a babe like Jill is beyond me.



Okay, I like this guy...3345roc, stick around and keep telling it like it is.



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Florasab
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Posted on Fri, Nov 22, 2013 09:12

yeah now i hear all the kinds of cow,  a mad cow, magic cow, brilliant cow, and Holy cow, Bless all the cows and hope  Blues heelers not on their toes or theyll be a speeding cow


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Livnlov
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Posted on Mon, Nov 18, 2013 17:23

Quoting 3345roc:

I can't say for sure... I imagine if you're into bestiality one cow might be prettier than the other. Sort of like " the eyes of the beholder"



So people from West Virginia are into bestiality?



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wwww12345
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Posted on Sat, Nov 16, 2013 03:56

The obam adminstration has fewer people who have actually had a job in the real world than any other adminstration by far..  The country is really suffering from their ignorance stupidity and may be damaged beyond repair. Certainly we will be set back a decade or two at the least.



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3345roc
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Posted on Fri, Nov 15, 2013 15:29

Quoting wwww12345:

I was wondering where Obam got his lessons in economics and job creation..


A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows. You have three-hundred people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reports the real situation.



Obama follows the principles of modified Robin Hood economics... steal from the rich and keep for myself!  As far as job creation, he never had a real job and I don't belive anyone in his admin has had one either.  Smiling Joe Biden went from high school to Congress without ever working.  He was in the bottom third of his college class, got 5 student deferments to avoid Vietnam, was in the bottom 10% of his law school class and has been in politics for the past 40 years.  He smiles so much I swear he doesn't have a central nervous system.  How he ever landed a babe like Jill is beyond me.



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wwww12345
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Posted on Fri, Nov 15, 2013 06:26

I was wondering where Obam got his lessons in economics and job creation..


A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows. You have three-hundred people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reports the real situation.



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3345roc
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Posted on Thu, Nov 14, 2013 21:17

I can't say for sure... I imagine if you're into bestiality one cow might be prettier than the other. Sort of like " the eyes of the beholder"



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Livnlov
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Posted on Thu, Nov 14, 2013 17:00

LOL, very interesting!

 

May I ask why the one on the left looks very attractive to the WEST VIRGINIA CORPORATION please?

 

Liv



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